At A Loss For Words
Do you ever have so much going on in your mind, that when you come to the LORD, you just don't know where to start? Your heart can feel every word you want to say, but the words just won't come...
I have times like these, which would seem odd that I would grasp for words to speak to my Lord, since I can write them... but that's the way it happens sometimes. I come before Him, wherever it may be that I choose, and I begin to speak to Him, worship Him... and yet, the words seem clumsy and so "unworthy" to offer.
In frustration, I begin to cry because I need so desperately to share all that is on my heart. Things about "life", about family, about thankfulness, about the things I did wrong and the guilt my heart aches over. Things about the perpetual changes life brings and how to adjust to them. How to accept them. How to be grateful for them. How to pray for them.
I'm so grateful Jesus looks at my heart and can already see what is there... and every emotion attached to each individual subject. I have found that when I just be still and ask Him to see what's in my heart... a peace comes over me. He will begin to speak to me about those issues, and I am able to answer with ease. Jesus, loving me through every area of my life and helping me in the ones "I THINK" I have covered.
Maybe, I shouldn't assume anything when I come before Him with a full heart. Giving up the idea "I" need to speak every time His presence surrounds me. There is a scripture after all which says, "Be still and know that I am God"... and it seems that every time I do just that, a sweet rhythm of dialogue begins to play.
I've always heard there is a reason we have two ears and only one mouth... Maybe I should just defer to the sense of hearing rather than the need to speak.